Why do we all love "Charles in Charge"? The answer is
evident - because it's very funny!! Hence I decided to collect some
of the best jokes from the series. The porblem is, I translated
most of them from Russian, so there many mistakes in them. If you
remember more precise quote, mail
me. All other quotes are of course welcome.
Charles to Buddy: Oh, it's happened again that you forgot your
brain under the pillow!
Charles to Buddy: Buddy, somebody has blowed up a candle in your
Charles to Buddy: If one applies your head to one's ear, one will
hear the noise of the sea!
Charles to Buddy: Another pearl from that oyster you call a brain!
Charles to Buddy: Did your brain come preassembled or did you
glue it together yourself?
Charles to Buddy: On the evolutianory scale you're just the small
step above wood!
Charles to Buddy: I'm always asked, why are we friends... And
I answer, it's because I'm not allowed to have a pet!
Charles to Buddy: Inside a cow's head, there's a brain the size
of a walnut. Inside your head, there's a walnut the size of a brain.
Buddy: Oh, and I thought, that "Charles" spells with double "l"!
Charles: And I thought, that you have two hemispheres. We were both
Charles: Does the dentist ring a bell?
Buddy: No Charles, the Salvation Army rings a bell.
[The scene is Charles is talking to Buddy who has forgotten to pick
up one of the children at the dentist's office]
Mr Powell: What's Nurse Bennet's first name?
Buddy: A friend of mine is a friend of the Smothers Brothers'
mother's brother's other brother.
Jamie: There will be no sexual maniacs!
Mr Powell: Will there be 16-years-old guys?
Mr Powell: And what I've told you?!
Buddy: Why are you so sad?
Charles: May be, that's because the world shrunk arond me and my
life transformed to the dirty mould, that lives under the rotten
Charles to Buddy: And I found paradoxical that there are more
brains in the small murmot's head than in your huge noddle!
Adam: World is the dirty ditch, where the cigarettes' ends of
humanity swim in the toxical departures of the life!
Mr Powell to Charles: How can you help Lembeck? You are just a
student, not a neurosurgeon!
Jamie: Oh! I date with ... (I don't remember the name), but I
have nothing to put on!
Adam: Think about good things, Jamie! If you put on nothing, he'll
date you once more!
Buddy: I had a very old dog and I taught it to turn over and to
feign death. Actually, I only thought it was feigning...
Buddy: Charles, let's go to watch waterball. There are so pretty
Charles: I can't.
Buddy: But it's Gamma-Gamma-Gamma!!!
Charles: I can't! I can't! I can't!
Charles to Buddy: Do you know, what I think is queer? Nothing
can grow on a stone... but your hair grow on your head!
Charles: Ok, Buddy. Where's the key?
Buddy: I don't have it -- I thought you had it.
Charles: Wait a minute, Buddy. You brought the lock; you're supposed
to have the key.
Buddy: I provided you with the lock -- the least you could do is
provide me with the key. Charles: Buddy, when you buy a lock, a
key is supposed to come with it.
Buddy: Not if the lock is on sale.
Charles: Buddy, a lock without a key is worthless.
Buddy: Not as worthless as a key without a lock.
Buddy to Charles: If I were in your shoes... I'd take them off
with the socks, shirt, jeans!..
Buddy: Do you know, that in Lilian's diner will sing the real Elvis
Mr Powell: Oh, and I thought he doesn't sing after his death!
Adam: I'm sticked! Please help me to get out!
Charles: One moment, I'll just iron my shoestrings...
Charles: My life is like a water, in which the eggs were boiled...
Charles: You are already fired! It's your first day in the shop,
Buddy: Our boss has no sense of humor. One girl came to me and asked:
"What color does suit me?" And I answered: "I'd like to see you
in something white, for example in my bath!"
Anybody: This is your fault, Charles!
[pick an episode]
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